Stepmom Innocently Shared Snickers with Stepdaughter Who has Peanut Allergy
Even though a peanut is a legume, those people who are allergic to peanuts often react likewise to tree nuts such as walnuts, almonds, hazelnuts, macadamia nuts, Brazil nuts, pecans, pistachios, and cashews according to Nemours TeensHealth.
That’s because they share a similarity in proteins. When a person who’s allergic to peanuts eats food containing this legume or tree nuts, his immune system reacts to these proteins, which causes the following symptoms:
- trouble breathing
- throat tightness
- watery, itchy, or swollen eyes
- sudden drop in blood pressure
- dizziness or fainting
Sadly, a pregnant woman gave one of her stepdaughters a Snickers bar. They were twins, and one of them has a peanut allergy. She didn’t mean it, but the girls’ mom was so furious that she would not allow her kids to be alone with her ever again.
This is the story of this Orignal Poster with the username u/throwaway028939292, which she published in Reddit’s r/AmItheA–hole forum: “I (25F) am married to my husband Richard (42M). He has two identical twin daughters with his ex-wife who are 9 years old. For the purpose of this post, I’ll call them Isabelle and Maria.
I struggle to tell the girls apart, so my husband gave Isabelle a pink wristband and Maria a blue one so I could tell them apart. I’m currently 5 months pregnant with our son, and one of my biggest cravings is Snickers bars. This is an issue because Maria is allergic to nuts, so I usually eat them in my car, our bedroom, or the backyard to avoid contamination. Maria’s allergy is quite severe, and she knows she isn’t supposed to eat anything with nuts in it.”
However, an accident happened one day while OP was watching Netflix. One of the twins arrived home and asked to sit by her. First, she asked the girl’s name, and she answered ‘Isabelle.’ OP looked at her wristband, and she was then sure that the girl was not Maria, who has the allergy.
OP was eating a Snickers bar while watching, and her stepdaughter took a piece of it and ate. In a matter of moments, the young girl was having an allergic reaction. OP was deeply alarmed, but she was thankful that they have an EpiPen at home. Then she rushed the girl to the hospital and called her dad.
The girl recovered well, but OP regretted learning that the twins had played a prank on her. Maria and Isabelle had exchanged wristbands to trick her. But the joke turned into a dangerous situation.
OP wrote about the incident at the hospital when her husband arrived. “He called their mother, who was infuriated, and she started yelling at me in the ER waiting area, and I ended up having a panic attack. Maria ended up being fine, and the girls came clean about wanting to play a prank on me. Maria hasn’t had a reaction for the past few years, so she’s saying she forgot how bad and serious they were. My husband is on my side, and he’s saying that Maria is old enough to know she shouldn’t be eating any nut products, and it’s not my fault – I thought she was Isabelle – but their mother is saying that I shouldn’t have any nut products in the house that could tempt Maria and since I struggle to tell them apart.”
Now, the twins’ mom doesn’t want them to have any alone time with OP, and even her relatives told OP that she was careless. These made OP very sad; she’s been really struggling to tell the two girls apart, but her autism makes it difficult for her to remember their faces.
Is she really an irresponsible person for causing the incident?
Comments from the AITA members:
From VerendusAudeo: “OP, you are NTA. Not only did you already attempt to confirm which individual you were giving the candy to, but you were explicitly lied to when you did so. Maria knowingly ingested a nut product of her own volition. She is not a wild animal who can’t control herself if you have nuts in the house. Honestly, are they going to keep her on a leash in the grocery store because she might be tempted by the peanut butter? 9 years old is old enough to start managing her own allergy.”
From plausibleturtle: “I have a risk of anaphylaxis due to nuts, including being in the same room as them – I agree with your take. I was responsible for my own allergy as early as 6, carrying my EpiPen to school with me. This was before schools were commonly made nut free. The whole world can’t stop for one allergy, and stepmom is absolutely applying the right measures. My dad used to do the same – only eat nuts in a certain area of the garage and was careful about having wipes to clean his hands before touching any door handles, etc. It’s easily managed with precautions.”
From GundyGalois: “NTA. This was an honest mistake on your part. The root cause is that the kids were lying, but, unfortunately, kids lie. As a parent, you have to account for that possibility. I recommend you don’t give nuts to either one just to play it safe. Their mom is overreacting, probably as an excuse to get to you. If their dad is okay with nuts in the house, that’s the end of it.”Whizzco