Parents of the bride and groom are the first people expected to arrive on time during weddings. It’s already understood that they are supposed to be there on time as it’s a major event in their children’s life. Their presence means so much to the couple as it implies support for the path they are about to take. A parent is responsible for being punctual and can only be excused for a few reasons — such as uncontrollable mishaps or health issues.
However, in Fair-Ferret-9911’s case, her parents have made being latecomers their personality. Even if it was their daughter’s wedding, they did not take the initiative to be on time for once. OP posted her story on Reddit to gather opinions if what she did was downright selfish or not. She initially intended to stay in a hotel, but her parents offered to stay with them. The house was half an hour from the church, and the wedding starts at 2:30. On that day, OP was worried about her parents not preparing themselves a few hours before the event. “They are adults and I am over dealing with them. I get ready. I send for an Uber and I am at the church for 2:00,” Fair-Ferret-9911 wrote.
As soon as she arrived, OP’s sister asked if there was any issue with her parents. She explained what happened, only to be told that they were her responsibility. Since their parents arrived 35 minutes late, her sister’s wedding got shortened due to another ceremony. OP’s family blamed her for the mishap — insisting that she should’ve been more responsible. Her decision to take an Uber became a huge issue that day. Even OP’s mother passed the blame on her. However, Redditors in the comment section think otherwise. Fair-Ferret-9911’s post received 25.4k upvotes and 2.4k comments that validated her decision.
“NTA; if they need to be reminded to get ready on their daughter’s wedding day, they need a live-in caretaker. Unless you were specifically asked to get them to the church, that’s not your job. If your sister truly thinks you messed up the wedding by being on time, I think it’s a good time for some space between you and your family,” theanti_girl commented. Whether it was OP’s task or not, the parents are fully functioning adults and aware of the situation.
“NTA, this sounds like a classic “missing stair” situation where nobody wants to yell at the problem person directly because that person is never going to change. So they instead yell at everyone else for not managing around the problem person,” crockofpot pointed out. Perhaps OP was deemed by their family as a person who would take all the blows and not be offended. However, they were wrong, especially since it wasn’t her fault.
Many Redditors provided excellent points, which is more than the validation OP needed. You can read the whole discussion on Fair-Ferret-9911’s post. This issue often happens in families but in different contexts. You could also share your thoughts and experiences about being the scapegoat of the family.Whizzco