Husband Refuses to Drive Wife with Disability to Son’s Wedding Because He Wasn’t Invited
Persons with disabilities usually suffer from social stigmas. These negative attitudes are a painful thing for them, making life even more difficult and challenging.
To make persons with disabilities feel that they are also cherished members of our society, here’s the proper way we should treat every one of them according to Respect Ability:
- Persons with disabilities are human beings, and so we should view their differences the same way as any other “unique” characteristics. Never make them feel that we are superior to them.
- Person-First versus Identity First: Ask The Person for Their Preference. Person-first language places the person before the disability. On the other hand, identity-first language puts the disability before the person. We should always ask the person how they would like to be referred to and avoid calling them by outdated terms like handicapped.
- We should talk directly to a person with a disability, not to their sign language interpreter or companion. Adult persons with disabilities are adults, and we should not decide for them or tell them what to do. Offer them all the options they have, just like everyone else, and be ready to discuss modifications you can make to adapt to their ability.
- Even if you’re willing to help, ask a person with a disability first if they need assistance. Respect the person’s decision, even if it seems impractical to you. However, in case of a dangerous situation, be ready to help them just as you would help other people without disabilities.
- You should not touch or move a person’s mobility equipment, such as a wheelchair, cane, or scooter, without asking the person first, since it’s part of their personal space.
- When talking with a person who has difficulty speaking, listen attentively and patiently. If you’re having a hard time understanding, repeat what you think you’ve heard and wait for the person’s response.
- When dealing with persons who have psychiatric disabilities, you should ask about their needs and be patient with them as much as possible. Some of them may have varying moods and personalities, while others may display high energy or sluggishness. Keep treating them with kindness.
- Bear in mind that there are visible disabilities as well as non-visible disabilities. Just because you can’t see the disability doesn’t mean it’s not real. Be always willing to adapt and extend as much understanding as possible.
- Lastly, it must be noted that it’s absolutely unethical to imitate any disabilities and that disability simulation experiences are solely for design and navigational purposes.
Yes, our society is endeavoring to eliminate discrimination against persons with disabilities. We should show love, consideration, and kindness toward all.
It’s most unfortunate that, in this viral post on Reddit’s r/AmItheA–hole forum, the very person who treated the woman with a disability poorly was her own husband.
With the username u/Mryrc56, this husband published the following story: “My son had his wedding days ago. We had some past issues that affected our relationship. No, we’re not on speaking terms after he decided to sell his grandmother’s home (my wife’s mother) instead of keeping it. He sent his mom an invitation but didn’t include me. I was fine with that, didn’t try to fight back or anything. But however, I refused to drive my wife to the wedding. She’s disabled and cannot drive, and we live 3 hrs away. I said that since I’m not invited to the wedding, nor am I taking part in it, then I shouldn’t have to drive there.”
Of course, his wife reacted to his being unreasonable and said that he was getting even with her due to her son’s decision. OP answered by telling his wife that she could make the travel arrangements since she was an adult. Also, if their son wanted her to be there at his wedding, then he should provide the proper transportation for her.
OP continued his post with the following details: “We had an argument, and she ended up being taken there by my brother. She refused to speak to me upon her return, and my brother said I was in the wrong for letting her fend for herself when my car and I were available.”
You don’t have to guess what the judgment of the AITA community is. You must be feeling such deep anger yourself. This selfish and narrow-minded man is his wife’s heaviest burden.
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