Redditor Addresses Concern for His Neighbor, Only to Be Accused as a Stalker
Today’s society has citizens that rarely address a genuine concern for one another. Comments towards other people may sound concerned, but sometimes there’s a subtle message behind it. Due to environmental and online influence, determining the actual intention of someone’s help can be confusing, especially if it’s from a stranger. You don’t know if they are concerned for your welfare or if it’s for their convenience. Despite the uneasy feeling, you need to assess their concern as well. It’s better to clarify their intentions by hearing them out instead of suspecting their objectives.
Neighbors are some of those people who randomly approach you and talk about their concerns. Sometimes their worries are because of issues affecting the neighborhood or a particular person. It’s best to engage in a friendly conversation when they reach out to you. As a result, misunderstandings are avoided and the main issue won’t be piled up with another. Give them the benefit of the doubt before ending in the wrong conclusion. A Redditor with one of those whose concerns was recently invalidated and suspected of being a creep.
In Maleficent_Order1936’s Reddit post, he explained his side of the story and how his concern started. The solution for the issue is pretty simple since it just had something to do with his neighbor’s clothing — which is highly related to her safety. OP explained, “I leave for work at 6am, and it’s still completely dark outside. I usually see the same woman running as I’m leaving my neighborhood. She only ever wears black clothing to run, and she runs in the middle of the street (the sidewalks are icy this time of year).”
The dark clothing worried OP since she might get hit by motor vehicles while running in the morning. Dark-colored clothes are undoubtedly difficult to notice at night, even when street lights are on. When OP realized that the woman was living across the street, he decided to address his concerns to her. “I wanted to say something right then but didn’t want to freak her out, so I decided to write a note and put it in her mailbox when I got home basically saying that I’ve noticed that she’s very hard to see when she wears black to run,” Maleficent_Order1936 shared.
Aside from addressing the problem, he also included suggestions such as wearing light-colored or reflective clothing. OP was truly trying to help — it’s the solution to avoid accidents in the area at all costs. He wrote the note out of genuine care, only to be confronted by the woman’s boyfriend. Maleficent_Order1936 was called out for acting like a stalker, and the boyfriend wouldn’t listen and insisted that he was right. “It was not my intention at all to freak her out, and now I’m wondering if I really did cross a boundary,” OP wrote.
If only the boyfriend had listened, he would know the main issue and be part of the solution. He should’ve been thankful that his girlfriend lives on a safe street with caring neighbors. Other Redditors validated OP’s ideas with supportive comments and pointed out that the boyfriend was wrong. “NTA. People in my area don’t, and I almost hit someone last year. If I wasn’t paying extra attention, I could have accidently hurt someone. The police in my area even hand out reflective stickers. It is a safety concern,” Blackstar1401 said.
Most Reddit users in the comment section understood OP’s intention, but someone also mentioned why the boyfriend concluded that he was a stalker. “Eh, it sounds like the boyfriend’s concern is more with leaving the note in the mailbox. That could come across as stalkerish (I.e. how did the OP know where she lives, are they watching her head home, how do they know she regularly runs without safety gear etc.)” 0biterdicta explained.
Nevertheless, nothing on the note sounded creepy or weird, especially when the concern was mentioned. If they doubted OP, coming to his house, agitated and uncivil, is not the proper way of handling an issue. Everything can be solved with a respectful exchange of each other’s perspectives. Also, if he was really a stalker, why would he even let his home address be known? The discussion is still on-going, and you can read the comment thread on Reddit. You might want to share your outlook on this issue and exchange opinions with other concerned online citizens.Whizzco