A Dying Mom’s Wish: Money for Her Nieces’ College Education But None for Her Toxic Parents

This woman has lived a full life; that’s why it’s easier for her to accept her terminal illness.

Everyone must come to terms with death, sooner or later, one way or another.

Really, what else could she ask for? She has a good and understanding husband along with great kids. They’ve been very successful in their chosen careers, and they have enough money to ensure a bright future for their loved ones.

Photo: Pexels/cottonbro studio

If there are a couple of thorns in their paradise, on her side of it, it’s OP’s parents and her brother, who’s neglected his daughters due to his drug addiction.

With the username u/Top_Juggernaut_551, this dying mom shared her story on Reddit’s popular r/AmItheA–hole forum after making a will that will benefit both her family and her nieces, but not her toxic parents who are looking after them, despite all the pressure that they and her irresponsible brother are putting on her.

This is OP’s post: “I (F38) have recently gotten a not great medical diagnosis and prognosis. I am at peace with it. So I have sat down with my husband and figured out my will. Obviously he will be receiving most of the estate. He has to take care of himself and our kids. He and I both have decent if not spectacular careers, and he likes his work.”

Photo: Pexels/Anna Shvets

She went on to relate that her oldest brother is an addict who has wasted their parents’ time and resources. Because of it, OP and her sister experienced hardship until OP decided she would pursue higher education to change her life’s course. For this, she was cut off by her “religious” parents who wanted her to remain home and help them “the way a good daughter should.”

OP doesn’t have any desire for looking back, but she feels pity for her nieces, whom her brother has abandoned to their parents’ care. OP and her husband had tried to gain custody of the girls, but her parents’ church helped them get a lawyer and block the couple’s efforts. But just when her parents succeeded in stopping them from taking her nieces, financial support for the girls also halted for reasons unknown to OP.

Photo: Pexels/cottonbro studio

But now, since she’s about to say goodbye forever, there’s something that OP wants to do for her nieces which she revealed in her post as she wrote: “So on my will, I am leaving my nieces money. Not for them to spend however they want. It is only to go to pay for their post-secondary education. If it isn’t used for that by the time they are 25, it will be donated to a charity that my parents hate. It advocates for women and reproductive rights. I sent my parents a copy of my will so they knew what was coming. They are the kind of people who would take out a loan counting on money from my death to bail them out. They are calling me an a-hole for not giving them the money to take care of my nieces. They are complaining because they are going into debt taking care of the girls. I offered again to take custody with my husband. If I can have them for two years, I know I can get them on a path away from that church.”

However, her toxic parents refused to give in and threatened to challenge her will once she’s gone. But to this, OP simply responded, “Good luck. My lawyer is confident that I have protected the money.” She then continued, “I just heard from my brother. He is calling me an a-hole for depriving his kids of help and forcing my parents into a shitty position. I asked him when the last time he sent them money to help with his kids was. He yelled obscenities and hung up.”

Photo: Pexels/cottonbro studio

OP’s husband is very supportive of her decision. She couldn’t say the same thing about the rest of her parents’ relatives, who have been trying to convince OP to help them without any conditions.

But to this dying mom, nothing can change her heart regarding this last wish for her nieces. She’s already done her best for her parents and brother, but their problem is their toxic minds and attitudes.

Who needs a church that does not promote love, the primary attribute of God? They are simply using OP’s young nieces in a game of emotional blackmail to benefit themselves. Truly, you can tell the good and the bad people from their fruits.

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