Growing up consists of a lot of changes that you’re either forced to go through or just naturally happen. You also get to choose what changes you want to manifest in life. It’s an exciting transition, especially when you go to college and live independently. You’ll start to experience actual adulthood — buying groceries, cooking for yourself, and being a working student to have an extra allowance. You get to know yourself on a deeper level, which is important in the future. However, changes and stepping into a new era can be overwhelming. The unpredictable future can trigger your anxiety — pressuring you into making decisions regarding your career and life path. Your life in between your teens and adulthood can make you happy, free, and confused.
For this reason, it’s important to look back and feel safe in your bedroom at home whenever you can. Stay with your family for a while to relieve all that stress and eliminate the anxious thoughts. Returning home might remind you of why you need to move forward. Your old bedroom will be your solace — a safe space where you started to dream and feel excited about the future. As a parent of a young adult, it’s best to let them soar and let go of their childhood on their own. Your children need pieces of their past selves to adjust well to changes. Do not change your home too much and take advantage of their vacant bedroom right away. ArtisticConfidence22 from Reddit made this mistake, which caused a rift in his relationship with his daughter.
His daughter Meg is in college and moved in with her boyfriend. Since her bedroom won’t be occupied for long, OP grabbed the opportunity to renovate their place. “Her bedroom used to be right next to our tiny living room. To make our tiny living room into a normal-sized living room, we knocked out my daughter’s room’s wall, refloored the space, and fixed the walls. Now it looks like the bedroom was never there, and we have a spacious living room,” OP explained. He was so content with the outcome that he forgot to consider his daughter’s feelings. As expected, Meg was heartbroken when she noticed the missing bedroom.
The first thing she thought of was that her parents don’t want her to move back anymore. It’s like the bedroom represented her part in the family, but now it’s gone. ArtisticConfidence22 even defended himself, saying, “I told her that if anything happens and she needs to move back, we will welcome her, and she could sleep on the couch as long as she wants. But she accused us of wanting to get rid of her forever and for her to never visit us since we got rid of her room so fast, only a few months after she moved out, and we should’ve waited longer.” Dealing with life transitions is an emotional journey that Meg’s parents might have forgotten. Redditors knew that OP was insensitive and explained the actual issue in the comment section.
Heavy_Sand5228 wrote, “Yeah, moving out for college is a major life change that is really hard to adjust to, and taking away her one space of familiarity without at least talking to her first was wrong. And no, the couch is not an adequate replacement for her room being gone in case that needed clarifying.” Indeed, offering the couch even made her feel like she was just a guest from now on. It was still her bedroom — a touch of something familiar that keeps her comforted after undergoing several changes. Parents must not forget that the process of letting go is never easy. It also made Meg feel like they were excited at the thought of living without her. Perhaps she thinks that letting go was so easy for them, yet she’s having a hard time.
“I don’t think the biggest problem people have is them renovating the room, it’s that they didn’t give her a heads up. The kid is 18 not 26,” Fast-Property-7087 commented. Apart from emotional security, the bedroom might have been a safety plan in case things go south with her boyfriend. She might have to move back in, especially if she still can’t afford a place of her own. There are many reasons why Meg had to respond that way. They should’ve communicated because sudden changes can really stress out a teenager going through a major life transformation. Parents must be extra considerate with their children — they still get to have a say about certain things even though they don’t own the home.