Being honest is a good thing. Beating around a bush can cause a lot of problems for people, so being upfront with people should be a positive trait, wouldn’t you think so?
Apparently not, according to this person’s family.
So we have this Redditor who posted on AITA about how she told her parents that she was planning on putting them in a retirement home instead of letting them live in her and her husband’s home.
But before you judge, there’s so much more to OP’s story than this.
“My parents loved my older brother and tolerated me.”
This statement in itself is impactful and can already be a sufficient clue on the flow of this story.
Instead of following the parents’ wish for OP to stay at home and take care of them and her brother, OP got a partial scholarship during her undergrad years and a full scholarship for her postgraduate degree years. OP graduated from her university with only a small debt and two degrees. Admirable.
Contrary to OP’s own hard work, her parents paid for her brother’s education. But when their parents decided to sell their home, they decided to live with OP instead of their beloved son.
As with any healthy relationship, OP discussed the situation and her hesitation about the situation with her husband, and the husband agreed. So OP told her parents no.
The parents had a bit of a problem – they already listed their home, and they said, “a dutiful daughter would take care of her parents in their old age.” OP then tried to negotiate with her parents by saying that if they gave her all the money from the sale of their home, she’d find them a nice retirement home and take care of the bills.
The parents obviously found this idea ridiculous. (As would I if the parents treated their children equally before, but… I mean, I’m all for treating your parents almost reverently, but the parents in this case are quite unfair.)
“They called me an ungrateful child and said that it was expected of me.”
Instead of arguing further, OP just sent her parents a check for a year’s worth of rent, food, utilities, and sundries. She also mentioned to her parents how she moved out just one year after she turned 18 and that they were responsible for her just up to that point. With no other thing to say, OP declared that her parents should not contact her again and that they will have to go through her lawyer the next time they wanted to talk to her.
“I have been playing whack-a-mole blocking all of their attempts to reach me. And all of the family members both in the States and back home that are calling me an a-hole.”
OP added that her brother contacted her as well and said that she was making their family look bad for not taking their parents in. OP countered and told her brother that he could either take their parents in himself or never bring up the topic to her again, or else she’ll cut off contact with him as well.
At the end of her post, OP added that her parents also didn’t approve of her choice of marrying a person with a different culture and religion, so they didn’t contribute at all to their wedding, but they still attended.
If you were planning on tagging OP as the AH, did that last addition change your mind?
Read the original post below!