Jealousy is hard to manage. It’s hard to get rid of that green-eyed monster once it wiggles its way into your brain.
This is especially true if you’re not an only child. Sibling jealousy or even cousin rivalry is one thing no one can escape, and even if you’re not aware of its existence yet when you’re still a child, lots of children do feel this, and I bet you’ve also exhibited some signs of jealousy throughout your childhood.
AITA for being “jealous” of my brother with cancer
I know. We’re kinda jumping into the middle of the story here with that strong title.
So we have our OP, who’s only 18, saying that she’s jealous of her brother who has terminal cancer.
As you’ve already probably guessed, she got jealous of the attention that her brother is receiving ever since he got sick. But she said that the situation is understandable.
“But now it feels like it’s to the point where they don’t care about me as much anymore,” she wrote.
The jealousy kind of started bubbling up when her birthday came up, and instead of wishing her a happy birthday, the family group chat was full of people asking how her brother was doing.
Finally, she confronted her mom about it and told her that she felt like she was a glass child…Well, she was called “disgusting” by her mother.
That devastating statement is what made OP wonder if she’s an a-hole for getting jealous of her brother.
In an edit, OP clarified that she’s not jealous that her brother has cancer. (This should’ve been obvious, but I guess Redditors have been commenting about it.)
“To be honest, I’m not jealous at all; I simply used that word because it’s the word my mom used to describe me.”
I guess OP really was just feeling neglected by the family. Since she’s relatively young, maybe she just wanted to feel loved, especially with what happened during her birthday.
“What I’m upset about is that my family doesn’t put much of an effort to check in on me or spend time with me. I understand that he has a limited time left and that they want to continue to spend time with him before he’s gone, but still, don’t I deserve love too?”
I can only imagine the struggle that’s going on in OP’s mind. She loves her brother and her family, but she doesn’t feel like it’s reciprocated, I guess?
On the bright side, OP added another update and told Reddit that she talked to her mom again about how she was feeling. Her mom apologized and told her that she understands what she felt and said that she was sorry for making OP feel neglected.
“She said she would try to include me more. So, hopefully, things will change and I won’t feel so neglected in the future.”
Oh! I almost forgot. OP is deemed NTA.
All the best to OP’s family! She’s been receiving a lot of well wishes in the comments section, and if you’d like to send her some as well, the original post is down below.